I don’t remember the first time I encountered the parable of the prodigal son, but I can make a strong guess on my reaction to the story.

I am the third son in my family followed by two sisters and a brother. My oldest brother was the “rule bender” and frequently suffered the consequences. Like most children I had a strong sense of justice, especially as it related to me. It sounds like I relate to the older brother. As I revisited this story in my spiritual development, I had the wonderful gift of reading the book The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen. Henri’s book has remained very popular. Henri quotes Sr. Sue Mosteller, one of the founders of L'Arche Daybreak, saying to him, “Whether you are the younger son or the older son, you have to realize you are called to be the father.”

At many stages of my life, I am presented with the nature of our all-loving God and the command to do his work. The tasks we do are not as important as the mindset we develop to guide our lives. In both the parable and the reading from Micah, we are reminded of God’s unconditional love for us. I love to dwell on the phrase attributed to God through the prophets “I loved you before you existed.” As a parent I found, conditional love is much easier than unconditional. I saw my role as helping to shape my children’s lives. I would say the job has become easier as a parent of adult children who lead their own lives and my best job ever, of being a grandparent. The false sense of control dwindles, and I have learned to just be in awe of their blessed lives.

This parable uses the family to tell its story, but the message needs to be heard and permeate all our lives. We need to see all people as our family and as Jesus requests “Feed my lambs, Feed my sheep.” Henri Nouwen was a beloved professor at Yale Divinity School, but he shares that he came closer to God as he labored as a staff member taking care of the handicapped adults at L'Arche Daybreak. I would encourage you to pick up a copy of his book on The Return of the Parable Son. Writing this reflection has prompted me to reread the book with fresh perspective. If rereading isn't feasible, I invite you to study the reading and notice how various characters evolve over time, ideally gravitating toward the father figure.